How was your christmas? Perhaps very restful and restorative, enjoying some much needed time away from computer screens and to do lists? Or for some of you maybe it was really stressful, tiring and lots of pressure? Whatever yours turned out like, we all feel huge pressure to start anew in the new year, to set big goals and to make big changes.
Let me ask you this. What was your resolution last year? And did you keep to it or achieve what you set out to? Chances are you can't even remember what you decided to do last year, and definitely didn't stick to it.
Many people are guilty of setting huge, unrealistic goals and then wondering why it's almost impossible to stick to them. Then when we fail, we feel awful. This cycle continues year on year and we end up not achieving what we set out to at all.
Here's 10 tips to help you set and achieve your goals:
Understand your 'why'. The goals we set to impress others or that involve doing something we don't really want to do are usually the hardest to stick to. Instead, choose a goal that you are actually looking forward to working on e.g. If you want to exercise more, ask yourself if this is to get approval from others or because you want to make this change for yourself? Write down what the benefits of making this change might be, and the draw backs too.
Set small achievable goals. What does success look like for you? You might have a large goal in mind such as losing a lot of weight or making huge dietary changes. While these types of goals may be well intended, the bigger they are the harder they are to get close to. Instead make smaller, easier goals which you are much more likely to stick to and ultimately end up doing more. For example, if your goal is to lose a lot of weight and you have established that this is for your own personal health and not to please someone else, instead of doing an extreme crash diet (which won't work), focus on a couple of very small actions you can take but that you feel you can commit to daily such as eating more vegetables each day and slightly increasing your daily steps count. Eventually these small actions will become habit if you practice them regularly, then you can increase the goals slightly, and so on.
Don't set too many goals. Aiming to change every area of your life overnight is not achievable for anyone as it is highly unsustainable. Pick one or two things you could do and focus on achieving them. This way you will have the energy to fulfill these goals at the same time as everything else life has to throw at you on a day to day basis! You are not superhuman so make it as easy as possible.
Be specific. Decide in advance the timing, frequency, how much etc of a particular activity/behaviour you are going to do. For example, I am going to do 5000 steps on weekdays and 7000 steps on weekends. I am going to include at least 3 portions of vegetables with every meal and will eat 2 pieces of fruit each day, I am going to switch off the TV at 9pm and do some stretches and reading before bed every night. Being specific with our goals helps us to stick to them. If we instead say 'I will go to the gym later, or maybe tomorrow', we get the the end of the day and our motivation has gone. The key to making lifestyle changes is incorporating them into routines so that they eventually become habits and we don't need to rely on motivation in order to do them.
Make it enjoyable. This one seems obvious doesn't it? Perhaps the reason it is hard to stick to the gym past january is because you don't actually enjoy going? If your goal is to be more physically active why not try something you personally enjoy and look forward to? How about playing tennis with a friend on the same day each week, joining the local park run/walk, trying out a dance class with your partner or friend. If you actually enjoy doing it you will do it more often and will get closer to your goals with little effort. If you hate it you will find every reason under the sun to 'skip this week' and start again when you have the motivation.
Remove obstacles. If I have junk food in the house I will eat it all, if I don't pre-plan my workouts for the following week and schedule them in my diary they will not happen, if I don't schedule my work breaks in advance I work through lunch, if I don't do my shopping on the weekend I am more likely to buy convenience foods when I'm hungry through the week. Identify what obstacles are making your goals difficult to achieve then make a plan to remove them as much as possible. e.g. I struggle to switch off the TV at 9pm because my partner likes watching TV before bed. Speak to your partner and perhaps they will join your mission. Or perhaps set a reminder to move into a different room at 9pm. After a while this will become a new habit.
Write it down & track progress. Make a chart and tick off each day you have achieved your goal. Stick it on the wall somewhere you frequently look at it. This is a great motivational tool to keep you feeling motivated in the early stages of changing a habit. Rather than looking up at the huge mountain in front of you, you can look back at how far you have come! If you manage to complete the goal every day you could also reward yourself with something at the end of the week. Try not to make this reward counter productive to your goal.
Set reminders. Add it to your calendar, set an alarm, leave a postit note on your computer screen. When forming a new habit it can be helpful to automate reminders until you no longer need them. It starts with a new routine and ends with new habits.
Get a buddy. Do you have a friend with the same goal? Sometimes it can be helpful to do something togerther for accountability or for moral support. Is it too scary joining a dance class on your own? Could you have a weekly steps count competition with a friend?
Growth mindset. If you fall off the horse, get back on and don't beat yourself up. Try not to focus on all the things you haven't done and instead focus on what you have already achieved. We all lose track from time to time and that certainly doesn't undo all the good you have already done. Just get back on when you feel ready and use the tools above to help you. We are not robots, we are busy humans with lots on our plates. Don't add more to your plate in the form of guilt. Appreciate that change takes time and small steps, and you will eventually reach your goal.
Try out some of these tips above and let me know how you get on in the comments section below. For a more tailored insight into your personal health and underlying drivers, book in to see me in my Lymington clinic or online.
Good luck! Annie x
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